Weekly Review

By Roger D. Hodge

David Kay, the outgoing head of the Iraq Survey Group, said that Iraq got rid of its illegal weapons programs years before the United States invaded. ¹ Kay made it clear that the United Nations weapons-inspection process had succeeded in disarming Iraq and said the Iraqis had been reduced to experimenting with ricin, a primitive but deadly poison easily made from fermented castor beans; Kay also said that the CIA had completely misread the situation in Iraq, largely because the agency had no on-the-ground spies after the U.N. inspectors were removed.² More than 100,000 Iraqis filled the streets of Baghdad in a march supporting the Grand Ayatollah Ali al-Sistani in his demand for direct elections;³ thousands also marched in Basra, Najaf, and Kerbala demanding that Saddam Hussein be turned over to the Iraqi people to stand trial.⁴ Skepticism was growing that the United States will succeed in handing power over to an Iraqi client regime before the presidential election, and the head of the occupying authority's Tribal Affairs Bureau admitted that he had been relying on a 1918 British report in his attempts to make sense of local politics.⁵ President George W. Bush made his State of the Union address just one day after the Iowa caucuses and appealed to voters to reelect him so that he could continue to wage war on terror.⁶ Archbishop Desmond Tutu called on the United States and its allies to confess that the conquest of Iraq was wrong.⁷ Vice President Dick Cheney defended Halliburton, which continues to pay him a salary, from what he said were "desperate attacks" by opponents of the Bush Administration. "They're rendering great service," he said. "They do it because they're good at it, because they won the contract to do it. And frankly the company takes a certain amount of pride in rendering this kind of service to U.S. military forces."⁸ Halliburton, which received most of its Iraq contracts by administrative fiat rather than through a competitive bidding process, admitted that its employees in Iraq have accepted $6.3 million in kickbacks.⁹ People at the Conservative Political Action Conference were grumbling that President Bush's fiscal policies, which have led to giant budget deficits, have been anything but conservative; they also¹⁰ denounced the USA Patriot Act and complained that "big-government Republicans," who seem to think government is the solution rather than the problem, have been too busy "baby-sitting the nanny state."¹¹

Republican staff members of the Senate Judiciary Committee were still under investigation for improperly infiltrating Democratic computers and reading strategy memos, which were then leaked to the press. Several computers, including a server from Senator Bill Frist's office, have been confiscated by the Senate's Sergeant-at-Arms.¹² An expert panel that was asked to review a Pentagon-funded Internet voting system declared that the system was fundamentally flawed. "Using a voting system based on the Internet," said one of the experts, "poses a serious and unacceptable risk for election fraud." The Pentagon nonetheless said that it "stands by" the program, which will be used in several primaries this year. "We feel it's right on," said a spokesman, "and we're going to use it."¹³ Newly released documents revealed that the U.S. Census Bureau gave information on millions of Americans to NASA for a study on the feasibility of mining such data to look for potential terrorists, and it¹⁴ was reported that American intelligence officials have compiled a list of five million potential terrorists worldwide.¹⁵ President Pervez Musharraf admitted that some of Pakistan's top nuclear scientists had sold nuclear technology to other countries but denied that the government was involved; Musharraf was accused of scapegoating the scientists to appease the United States.¹⁶ Art Garfunkel got busted with pot.¹⁷ Russian soldiers rescued 10 tons of beer kegs that became trapped under the ice of a frozen Siberian river; after divers from the Ministry of Emergency Situations failed to dislodge the kegs, a T-72 tank saved the day.¹⁸ Senator John Kerry won the Iowa caucuses.¹⁹ Howard Dean decided to tone down his campaign persona after the media became alarmed at his "nutty" Iowa concession speech.²⁰ There was speculation that Israeli prime minister Ariel Sharon might soon be indicted for taking bribes.²¹ A Mexican man reportedly hacked open his father's head with a machete, drank his blood, and then ate his brains.²²

The European Mars Express mission made the first direct measurement of ice on Mars; a²³ second American Mars rover, called Opportunity, landed on the planet; and new²⁴ research suggested that astronauts sent to Mars might be paralyzed by the prolonged lack of gravity.²⁵ Scientists found that the Ebola virus can spread from dead animals such as gorillas to human beings, and genetic analysis suggested that the five recent outbreaks of the disease were caused by five distinct strains of the virus, which is among the most contagious known, rather than one strain that had mutated. "If Ebola is popping up randomly," said one scientist, "then things are pretty hopeless."²⁶ Avian influenza was spreading across Asia; the World Health Organization said it was the largest outbreak in history.²⁷ Indonesia said that millions of chickens had died of the flu in recent weeks, and workers in Thailand were bagging live chickens and burying them in pits.²⁸ Indonesia's agriculture minister said that his government can't afford to dispose of the dead chickens.²⁹ Women who have used dark hair dye for at least 24 years have a greater chance of developing cancer, a study found, and³⁰ frequent underarm shaving together with deodorant use could increase the risk of breast cancer.³¹ Saudi Arabia's highest-ranking cleric said that women's rights are anti-Islamic, and an³² American diplomat in London declared that referring to the American Jewish lobby is anti-Semitic.³³ The Salvation Army received a $1.5 billion donation, and an³⁴ Indian diamond seller who had hidden $900 worth of small diamonds in a pile of hay was busy feeding laxatives to his cow.³⁵ There were new massacres in Congo,³⁶ Rwanda's former minister for higher education was given a life sentence for genocide, and a³⁷ sniper was still shooting cars in Ohio.³⁸ Captain Kangaroo died.³⁹ Britain's naked rambler completed his 900-mile journey and put on some clothes.⁴⁰ A Japanese scientist created a belly-dancing robot.⁴¹