Weekly Review

By Paul Ford

In Iraq car bombs killed 24 people,¹ and a British helicopter was shot down over Basra, killing all five crew members.² In Anbar, at a ceremony for new Iraqi soldiers, the graduates were told that they would be sent outside of their home province to serve, leading several soldiers to tear off their clothes in protest.³ Iraqi police shot a 14-year-old boy named Ahmed Khalil in the head for being a gay prostitute.⁴ In Afghanistan the power of the Taliban was growing.⁵ Analysts found that President George W. Bush had claimed exemption from 750 laws,⁶ and Bush said that the best moment of his presidency was when he caught a seven-and-a-half-pound perch.⁷ There was a marked increase in cases of fish lice.⁸ In England the Archbishop of York played African drums and led a conga line as he wore a hoodie,⁹ and in New York City, an Italian tourist was attacked and suffered a broken arm after he sat down on a motorcycle that was parked outside the local Hells Angels clubhouse.¹⁰ A man in Brooklyn, angry because someone asked him to stop drinking, shot and killed a 3-year-old girl.¹¹ The cost of the memorial for the victims of the World Trade Center attacks was estimated at around $972 million, or about 26 percent of the original cost of the World Trade Center.¹² Due to extreme inflation, toilet paper in Harare, Zimbabwe, cost $145,750 per roll (or U.S. $0.69).¹³

A plane flying from Armenia to Russia crashed into the Black Sea, killing 113 people.¹⁴ President Bush said he would like to see the prison at Guantánamo Bay closed,¹⁵ and CIA Director Porter Goss resigned, as did Goss appointee Kyle "Dusty" Foggo, the executive director of the CIA; Foggo is under investigation for his relationship to two defense contractors who allegedly bribed former congressman Randy "Duke" Cunningham and Pentagon officials.^{16 17 18} After being sentenced to life in prison for his role in planning the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, Zacarias Moussaoui asked a judge to consider a "not guilty" plea instead. "I now see," said Moussaoui, "that it is possible that I can receive a fair trial even with Americans as jurors." The judge denied the request.¹⁹ Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad sent a letter to President Bush seeking to improve relations between Iran and the United States; the White House denounced the letter but would not confirm whether the President had read it.²⁰ A 1918 letter emerged that appears to show that the members of the Yale Skull and Bones society stole the skull of the Apache leader Geronimo from its grave, and may have used it in rituals.²¹ A study found that white middle-aged Britons were, on average, healthier than white middle-aged Americans,²² and Prince Henrik of Denmark, honorary president of the Danish Dachshund Club, told an interviewer that he enjoys eating dogs.²³

Chinese scientists said that the glaciers of the Tibetan plateau were evaporating. "The melting glaciers," said Dong Guangrong, "will ultimately trigger more droughts, expand desertification, and increase sand storms." One such storm recently dumped over 300,000 tons of dust in Beijing; technicians cleaned away some of the dust by firing seven rocket shells filled with silver iodide into the air to produce four-tenths of an inch of rainfall.^{24 25} Scientists in Korea revealed a new, attractive female robot that understands 400 words and can blink. "We are working," said one roboticist, "on upgrading the android with the aim of making it move its legs by the end of this year."²⁶ An Australian painter named Tim Patch unveiled a portrait of Prime Minister John Howard that he had painted with his penis,²⁷ and the head of the Iranian Physical Education Organization banned effeminate-looking athletes.²⁸ In Hungary, it was widely reported, construction workers renovating a house discovered, and drank, a barrel of rum; when the barrel was empty they found that it contained a pickled human corpse (the story was later revealed as an urban legend).²⁹ In Valparaiso, Indiana, a deaf man got into a fight with a man with two prosthetic legs; police later arrested the deaf man via a note.³⁰ Scientists in Colorado said that the ozone layer was recovering,³¹ Qatar announced $60 million in aid for New Orleans,³² and Kansas raised its minimum marriage age to 15.³³