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Turns out everything–and I mean everything–you’ve heard about Hillary is true. I received a stream of emails in reply to my item yesterday about rumors of an affair between Hillary Clinton and her aide, Huma Abedin.
Often email writers make wild allegations but in this case I was provided solid evidence to back up the charges. For example, Robert Morrow, who describes himself as “one of the nation’s top experts on wild Hillary and wild Bill,” told me he’d learned from experience that “every crazy rumor about the Clintons is true.” For example, Hillary’s past lovers include Webb Hubbell (“probably the real dad of Chelsea”) and Vince Foster (“Hillary’s lover and emotional husband”). Furthermore, “Hillary and Bill are sociopaths, not unlike serial killers such as Ted Bundy.” Thus, to put it all together, Hillary is shacking up with Huma. Q.E.D.
But there’s more. I was also alerted to a photograph that showed Huma in the background while Clinton spoke with Ellen DeGeneres during a recent trip to New York–lesbianism by association. Others unearthed evidence that Huma–whose job description according to a profile by the New York Observer is “omnipresent traveling assistant” — is constantly seen with Hillary on the campaign trail. Case closed. Hillary and Huma are an item.
But wait–then I received proof that Hillary is strictly hetero. The most compelling evidence: a previously undisclosed photograph of Hillary with her past lovers, Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden. I’ve been assured that the photo (too obscene to post here) is genuine.
Could Hillary and Huma be partners? Sure, anything’s possible. But “everyone knows” that John Edwards has a girlfriend in New York and that Cindy McCain is cheating on her husband, to cite two other confirmed stories I’ve heard recently. Let’s pretend for just a moment that all of these stories are true. The reporter who sets out to prove any of them has a tough job because there just aren’t a lot of presidential candidates who make Gary Hart-sized mistakes anymore. In the case of Hillary and Huma, is it really possible that their tryst is something “everyone knows?” Have they been making out at bars around Washington? Have they shared their feelings widely with campaign staffers and friends? Is there a photo album with pictures of them holding hands as they stroll through Central Park and ride together on the Cyclone at Coney Island?
Meanwhile, as the rumors swirl, the interesting story about all of this remains unsolved: which Democratic presidential campaigns have been whispering about the alleged Hillary-Huma affair?
More from Ken Silverstein:
Commentary — November 17, 2015, 6:41 pm
The Clintons’ so-called charitable enterprise has served as a vehicle to launder money and to enrich family friends.
i. stand with israel
I listen to a lot of conservative talk radio. Confident masculine voices telling me the enemy is everywhere and victory is near — I often find it affirming: there’s a reason I don’t think that way. Last spring, many right-wing commentators made much of a Bloomberg poll that asked Americans, “Are you more sympathetic to Netanyahu or Obama?” Republicans picked the Israeli prime minister over their own president, 67 to 16 percent. There was a lot of affected shock that things had come to this. Rush Limbaugh said of Netanyahu that he wished “we had this kind of forceful moral, ethical clarity leading our own country”; Mark Levin described him as “the leader of the free world.” For a few days there I yelled quite a bit in my car.
The one conservative radio show I do find myself enjoying is hosted by Dennis Prager. At the Thanksgiving dinner of American radio personalities (Limbaugh is your jittery brother-in-law, Michael Savage is your racist uncle, Hugh Hewitt is Hugh Hewitt) Dennis Prager is the turkey-carving patriarch trying to keep the conversation moderately high-minded. While Prager obviously doesn’t like liberals — “The gaps between the left and right on almost every issue that matters are in fact unbridgeable,” he has said — he often invites them onto his show for debate, which is rare among right-wing hosts. Yet his gently exasperated take on the Obama–Netanyahu matchup was among the least charitable: “Those who do not confront evil resent those who do.”
Pairs of moose-dung earrings sold each year at Grizzly’s Gifts in Anchorage, Alaska:
An Alaskan brown bear was reported to have scratched its face with barnacled rocks, making it the first bear seen using tools since 1972, when a Svalbardian polar bear is alleged to have clubbed a seal in the head with a block of ice.
A former prison in Philadelphia that has served as a horror-movie set was being prepared as a detention center for protesters arrested at the upcoming Democratic National Convention, and presumptive Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump fired his campaign manager.
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“Matt was happy enough to sustain himself on the detritus of a world he saw as careening toward self-destruction, and equally happy to scam a government he despised. 'I’m glad everyone’s so wasteful,' he told me. 'It supports my lifestyle.'”