Weekly Review — March 29, 2011, 12:00 am

Weekly Review

[Image: A Humbug, December 1853]

Libyan antigovernment forces, whose swift advance under coalition air strikes was slowed fifty miles outside Muammar Qaddafiâ??s home city of Sirte, signed an oil deal with Qatar, which officially recognized them as Libyaâ??s new leadership. Four New York Times journalists were released after spending six days in Libyan custody, during which time they were beaten by pro-Qaddafi forces and shot at by rebels before being moved to a quiet detention center furnished with the plays of Shakespeare. Al JazeeraGuardianNYTA referendum in Egypt showed that three quarters of voters supported changes to the countryâ??s constitution, while civil unrest continued in Bahrain, Morocco, Saudi Arabia, Syria, and Yemen.GuardianGOP presidential hopeful Donald Trump, touting his foreign-policy credentials, bragged of swindling Muammar Qaddafi on a multimillion-dollar real-estate deal. “I donâ??t want to use the word â??screwed,â??” said Trump, “but I screwed him.”The HillMasataka Shimizu, the president of Tokyo Electric Power Co., remained in self-imposed seclusion, citing overwork, while two of his employees at the Fukushima-Daiichi nuclear power plant were hospitalized for beta-ray burns to their feet.KyodoBloombergKyodo News

In South Dakota, where the waiting period to purchase a handgun is two days, Governor Dennis Daugaard signed a law compelling women to wait three days before getting an abortion. “Women need to just be reminded of the fact there is a natural, legal relationship between them and their child,” said state representative Roger Hunt.HuffPostNYTElizabeth Taylor and Geraldine Ferraro died, as did the inventors of cinĂ©ma vĂ©ritĂ© and Super Glue. NYTChicago TribuneLATHuffPostAfter eight minutes of deliberation, a “jury” supervised by Florida preacher Terry Jones found the Koran guilty of “crimes” and sentenced it to death by burning. “I hate these people,” said observer Jadwiga Schatz, referring to Muslims.AFPJurors in the perjury trial of former baseball star Barry Bonds listened to a taped conversation about his steroid injections. “Is that why Barry didnâ??t just shoot it into his butt all the time?” asks Bondsâ??s manager in the recording. “Oh no, I neverâ??I never just go there,” replies his trainer, “I move it all over the place.”AFPThe University of Bristol acquired two Breedâ??n Betsy bovine rectal simulators, allowing veterinary students greater freedom to learn cow anatomy and practice insemination techniques. “The first rectalling class with a new group of students is much more successful,” said teaching fellow Mike Steele. “No student is in a cow for more than five minutes now.”Bristol University

The royal wedding fruitcake began its month-long maturation, Buckingham Palace declined to divulge the dimensions of its dinner napkins, MPs debated the allowability of tweeting in Commons, and the editors of the OED traced OMG back to 1917.PeopleWSJGuardianOEDPaleontologists uncovered the bones of a giant short-eared rabbit incapable of hopping, and Newt Gingrichâ??s Twitter posts on chocolate Easter bunnies inexplicably disappeared.DiscoveryVanity FairA San Antonio man was embroiled in a three-hour armed standoff with police after he discovered that the price of a Taco Bell Beefy Crunch Burrito had risen from 99 cents to $1.49. “They did used to be 99 cents, but that was just a promotion,” said restaurant manager Brian Tillerson.mySAA whistling President Obama found the French doors to the Oval Office locked on his return from Latin America.ABCA SWAT team in Maricopa County, Arizona, served a search warrant on a suspected cockfighter by first flattening his farmhouse gate with a tank. Action-movie star and martial artist Steven Seagal, a passenger in the tank, later told reporters, “Animal cruelty is one of my pet peeves.” A hundred roosters were euthanized at the scene.GuardianKPHO

Share
Single Page

More from Anthony Lydgate:

From the July 2014 issue

Vulgar Materialism

Weekly Review April 8, 2014, 8:00 am

Weekly Review

Afghanistan votes, the U.S. Supreme Court rules in favor of wealthy political donors, and China standardizes its pets 

Weekly Review February 25, 2014, 8:00 am

Weekly Review

Upheaval in Ukraine, yobbery in the United Kingdom, and a historic douche in the United States

Get access to 164 years of
Harper’s for only $39.99

United States Canada

CATEGORIES

THE CURRENT ISSUE

March 2015

A Sage in Harlem

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

The Man Stopped

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

The Spy Who Fired Me

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

Giving Up the Ghost

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

Invisible and Insidious

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

view Table Content

FEATURED ON HARPERS.ORG

Article
No Slant to the Sun·

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

“She didn’t speak the language, beyond “¿cuánto?” and “demasiado,” but that didn’t stop her. She wanted things. She wanted life, new experiences, a change in the routine.”
Photograph © Stuart Franklin/Magnum Photos
[Browsings]
Burn After Reading·

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

William Powell published The Anarchist Cookbook in 1971. He spent the next four decades fighting to take it out of print.
“The book has hovered like an awkward question on the rim of my consciousness for years.”
© JP Laffont/Sygma/Corbis
Article
The Fourth Branch·

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

“Both the United States and the Soviet Union saw student politics as a proxy battleground for their rivalry.”
Photograph © Gerald R. Brimacombe/The LIFE Images Collection/Getty Images
Article
The Spy Who Fired Me·

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

“In industry after industry, this data collection is part of an expensive, high-tech effort to squeeze every last drop of productivity from corporate workforces.”
Illustration by John Ritter
Article
Invisible and Insidious·

= Subscribers only.
Sign in here.
Subscribe here.

“Wherever we are, radiation finds and damages us, at best imperceptibly.”
Photograph © 2011 Massimo Mastrorillo and Donald Weber/VII

Hours per day that a death-row inmate in China wears hand and ankle restraints:

24

A multidisciplinary team detected cardiac arrhythmia in the works of Beethoven.

There was a run on cases of 5.56mm M855 green-tip rifle bullets, after the White House moved to ban their manufacture and sale because they can pierce police armor.

Subscribe to the Weekly Review newsletter. Don’t worry, we won’t sell your email address!

HARPER’S FINEST

Driving Mr. Albert

By

“He could be one of a million beach-bound, black-socked Florida retirees, not the man who, by some odd happenstance of life, possesses the brain of Albert Einstein — literally cut it out of the dead scientist's head.”

Subscribe Today