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7/84Medals awarded by Britain for action in the Falklands: 679

9/84Percentage of labor negotiations in the U.S. that resulted in union “givebacks” last year: 15

    In Britain: 0

9/84Number of U.S. residents five years old or older who do not speak English: 1,218,000

    Butlers in Britain today: 70

12/85Number of people who attended the International Conference on Spelling Reform held in England last summer: 17

2/85Percentage decrease in articles by British scientists in the 2,000 leading scientific journals, from 1973 to 1980: 10

2/85Percentage of the nuclear waste in the world’s oceans that was dumped by Britain: 90

2/85Number of sites on British roads marked to protect toads crossing during the mating season: 150

4/85Percentage of international telephone conversations that are conducted in English: 85

5/85Number of the top ten industrial companies in Nicaragua that are owned by the state: 5

    Number in which U.S., British, or Canadian corporations own a controlling interest: 4

7/85Percentage of all money spent by American tourists in Britain in 1984 that was spent at Harrods: 6

8/85Value of the art and antiques exported from England in 1984: £615,000,000

9/85Percentage of U.S. oil imports today that come from Mexico, Canada, and Britain: 33

    That come from Arab countries: 15

1/86Percentage change in Britain’s manufacturing output since 1979: -6

1/86Number of U.S. companies acquired by British companies in 1984: 50

2/86Percentage increase in the number of vegetarians in England since 1983: 30

4/86Value of British government assets Prime Minister Thatcher has sold since 1979: $20,000,000,000

1/87Number of times since 1979 Britain has “refined” its method of counting the unemployed: 19

    Number of those refinements that resulted in a lower unemployment rate: 18

2/87Number of people on waiting lists for medical treatment in Britain: 673,107

4/87Number of states that have declared English their official language: 8

4/87Percentage of Hispanics in California who voted to make English the state’s official language: 44

5/87Amount Britain’s Labour Party proposes to pay students 16 and older to stay in school (per week): £27

6/87Odds offered by London bookies that a space creature, dead or alive, will land on Earth in the next year: 250 to 1

    That Pat Robertson will win the Republican presidential nomination: 50 to 1

12/88Average number of years of marriage before an unfaithful British husband has his first affair: 8

2/88Tons of earth that will be moved to build the tunnel under the English Channel: 7,500,000

5/88Average number of words added to the English language every day since 1966: 6.5

6/88Percentage of British citizens who say that Northern Ireland should remain part of the United Kingdom: 27

    Percentage of political deaths in Northern Ireland, since 1969, that have been caused by the IRA: 40

8/88Number of the 23 daily newspapers in New York City that are published in English: 10

8/88Amount spent this year on Chinese yak hair for British Army helmets: $300

9/88Rank of Princess Di, Bruce Willis, and Michael J. Fox in number of magazine cover appearances last year: 1,2,3

1/89Estimated amount the British government spent worldwide to stop publication of Spycatcher: $6,000,000

7/89Length of the entry for the word “set” in the 1989 edition of the Oxford English Dictionary, in pages: 60

2/90Percentage decrease, since 1979, in the number of professorships in American studies in Britain: 50

5/90Number of words in the English language that exist because of typographical errors or misreadings: 381

9/90Number of snails that animal-rights activists liberated from a snail farm in England last March: 153,000

12/91Value Lloyd’s of London has placed on a Viking turd owned by England’s Archaeological Resource Centre: $34,000

4/91Amount the British Boy Scouts have earned since 1988 by selling corporate advertising space on merit badges: $500,000

4/92Percentage of Japanese graduating high-school seniors who have taken at least six years of English-language classes: 100

8/92Chances that an American is of English ancestry: 1 in 8

11/93Percentage of economics majors at Ivy League colleges who say at least one of their parents has smoked marijuana: 23

    Percentage of English majors who say this: 41

7/93London bookmakers’ odds that the British monarchy will be abolished by the year 2000: 1 to 5

1/94Chances that a Briton would move to another country “if free to do so”: 1 in 2

2/94Number of words in the new Shorter Oxford English Dictionary that are Japanese: 2,500

2/94Issues of Mad the magazine will give Prince Charles this year for winning its Alfred E. Neuman Look-Alike Contest: 12

6/94Number of American states in which a notary public is required to be literate in English: 12

7/94Number of Thomas Jefferson’s slaves who escaped to join the British during the American Revolution: 22

7/94Number of cows electrocuted by a faulty milking machine in Maidstone, England, last March: 33

7/94Membership of the British Sausage Appreciation Society: 10,000

11/95Estimated number of years that Ireland’s Sinn Féin leader Gerry Adams received British public assistance: 10

2/95Percentage of Britons who say John Major’s Conservative Party seems “very sleazy and disreputable”: 73

2/95Ratio of the number of Britons who blame Prince Charles for his failed marriage to the number blaming Diana: 5:1

3/95Rank for which the words “town” and “priest” are tied, among the oldest English words cited in the Oxford English Dictionary: 1

3/95Number of years McDonald’s has been suing 2 unemployed Britons for distributing pamphlets calling its food “unhealthy”: 4

5/95Membership of the British Old Bags Club, a group of middle-aged divorcees: 450

5/95Number of Britons seeking medical care each year for injuries sustained while attempting to open cans of corned beef: 8,000

6/95Percentage of Americans of English ancestry who are college graduates: 28

    Percentage of Americans of Russian ancestry who are: 49

8/95Year in which England repealed a law mandating an “orderly, proper line” at bus stops: 1995

8/95Percentage of Britons between the ages of 11 and 14 who cannot identify Winston Churchill: 31

9/95Number of people injured during a cheese-rolling competition held last May in Cheltenham, England: 18

1/96Ratio of the amount Britons spent on lottery tickets last year to the amount they spent on tea: 4:1

10/96Estimated number of frozen embryos disposed of by British fertility clinics last August: 5,500

    Number of these disposed of at the request of the couples who produced them: 2,500

11/96Years before becoming the prime minister of Britain that John Major was “on the dole”: 28

11/96Year in which America last had as bad a relationship with Britain as it does today, according to James Baker: 1773

11/96Year in which the British sacked the city of Washington and burned the White House: 1814

12/96Amount that Wanted, a British TV game show, pays contestants for each day they elude a team of former KGB agents: $1,560

12/96Amount a London insurance firm will pay clients who can prove they were impregnated by God: $1,500,000

3/96Percentage of British women who believe there is “too much sex” in women’s magazines: 46

3/96Percentage of British Members of Parliament who believe that stress is reducing their interest in sex: 38

5/96Estimated number of robins that mistake electric light for dawn each night in Great Britain: 10,000

5/96Maximum daily number of tourists allowed at the Beatrix Potter cottage in Sawrey, England: 800

7/96Days in jail to which a British retiree was sentenced in February for excessive pigeon feeding: 56

8/96Percentage change, since last February, in sales of vegetarian cookbooks at Britain’s largest book chain: +300

9/96Number of great crested newts a British housing developer plans to “responsibly relocate” by the end of the year: 19,000

1/97Percentage of Americans who say that they speak English “very well”: 94

10/97Months two British neighbors spent hooting at owls at night before realizing they were hooting at each other: 12

11/97Tons of flowers and other tokens deposited outside Princess Diana’s palace in the week following her death: 11,200

    Percentage who find Labour Leader Tony Blair “smarmy”: 24

7/97Percentage of British fluid intake that is tea: 42

7/97Number of years British Prime Minister Tony Blair served as lead singer of the rock band Ugly Rumours: 2

1/98Number of Fiat owners Paris police were ordered last fall to question in connection with Princess Diana’s death: 40,000

10/98Rank of meeting the Spice Girls among the “greatest moments of my life” according to Prince Charles: 1

12/98Weeks required to complete the Santa course offered by Britain’s Weston College: 8

5/98Number of Poets-in-Residence sponsored by Britain’s National Lottery this year: 4

8/98Amount British Nuclear Fuels paid the British Scouts last year to add its logo to their scientist badge: $49,776

8/98Chances that a Briton believes that Britain did more good than harm to its colonies: 3 in 5

1/99Percentage of the fall 1998 issue of Britain’s The Ecologist magazine devoted to an investigation of Monsanto: 95

    Percentage of the issue’s entire press run immediately pulped by the printer, for fear of breaking British libel laws: 100

10/99Amount a clerical error has cost the British government in excess payments to the Queen since 1991: $31,500,000

10/99Legal fees paid by Princess Diana’s memorial fund this year to stop the Franklin Mint’s sale of Diana souvenirs: $48,000

11/99Portion of the words in Webster’s New World Dictionary memorized by one non-English-speaking Thai Scrabble champ: 2/3

4/99Estimated attendance at a rally for debt relief for poor countries held outside Britain’s 1998 G-7 summit: 60,000

5/99Chance that a day since December 28 has passed without U.S. or British forces bombing Iraq: 1 in 2

8/99Pounds of plutonium that a British nuclear plant has dumped into the Irish Sea since 1959: 397

8/99Percentage change in the number of ponds in Britain since the turn of the century: -75

8/99Number of days last year that a British art museum exhibited a mound of dung from Dolly, the world’s first cloned sheep: 51

    Apparent age, in years, of three-year-old Dolly ‘s DNA: 9

9/99Maximum fine to which a British grocer will be subject next year for using anything other than the metric system: £5,000

9/99Hours of helicopter lessons required for the new “Super Butler” degree at London’s most expensive butler school: 60

9/99Pages of the British royal family’s medical records found in a folder lying by the side of a Scottish road last March: 70

1/00Percentage change in the value of India’s cotton exports between 1815 and 1832: -92

    Percentage change in the amount of British cotton products India imported during the same period: +1,500

10/00Percentage change since last year in the number of deaths in Britain due to the human form of mad cow disease: +175

3/00Percentage change since 1997 in the number of Britons waiting to get on the National Health Service’s waiting list: +100

3/00Percentage of the residents of Northern Ireland who report being happy: 92

    Percentage of the residents of the rest of Ireland who do: 90

    Price a year earlier: $3.87

8/00Chance that a contestant who’s appeared on ABC ‘s Who Wants to Be a Millionaire has won a million dollars: 1 in 67

    Chance that a contestant who appeared on the show’s British precursor ever won a million pounds: 0

1/01Number of British doctors who visited Cuba last March to study its health-care system: 115

12/01Internal code number the British census has assigned to citizens who cited their religion as “Jedi Knight”: 896

3/01Average number of cows destroyed each day in Britain last year in an effort to eliminate mad cow disease: 2,274

    Number of European countries in which cases of the disease mad cow disease have been documented: 13

4/01Years before a British official was killed in Athens last winter that a CIA bureau chief was killed there with the same gun: 25

4/01Rank of Oasis singer Liam Gallagher among public figures most reviled by Britons: 3

6/01Estimated number of people who tried to cross illegally into England via the Channel Tunnel each night last year: 125

11/02Rank of the United States and Britain among nations whose residents are most likely to be obese: 1,2

12/02Organizers’ estimated attendance at this fall’s largest peace rallies in London and New York, respectively: 400,000, 25,000

    Estimated attendance according to police in each city: 150,000, 12,000

    Number of estimates cited in each rally’s coverage in the London Times and the New York Times, respectively: 2, 0

5/02Number of Britain’s Anglican clergy to whom their union is offering martial-arts training this year: 1,500

5/02Percentage of British clergy who were attacked on the job between 1997 and 1999: 12

    Percentage of British probation officers who were: 8

5/02Estimated percentage by which British arms sales to African countries next year will exceed such sales in 1999: 400

7/02Percentage of male fish in two English rivers that scientists say have been “effectively feminised” by estrogen in the water: 100

7/02Percentage of Britons who feel “vulnerable” in forests: 31

8/02Years before the death of Britain’s Queen Mother in March that the Times of London first wrote her obituary: 64

9/02Rank of the United States and Britain among countries viewed most favorably by Muslims aged 15 to 25: 1,2

2/03Chance that a Briton polled online believes that the United States is a bigger threat to world peace than is Iraq: 1 in 3

2/03Percentage of Jamaicans who say they would be “better off today” had Jamaica remained a British colony: 53

3/03British price-fixing fine levied last November on Hasbro, the maker of Monopoly: $8,000,000

5/03Fine that Britain’s education minister has proposed levying on parents whose children are chronic truants: $3,900

5/03Chance that a British military reservist called up since January has asked to be excused from duty: 1 in 8

6/03Percentage change in central London’s average rush-hour car speed since a £5 toll was imposed there in February: +111

7/03Percentage by which a British flag maker’s sales of U.S. flags in March exceeded those a year earlier: 25

    Percentage by which its sales of Iraqi flags did: 10,000

7/03Number of terrorism indictments brought since September 2001 by the U.S. Attorney’s Office in New Jersey: 62

    Number of them brought against Middle Eastern students for paying others to take their English proficiency tests: 60

9/03Percentage of the first month of British sales of the new Harry Potter book accounted for by “adult” editions: 11

1/04Rank of rhinoplasty and liposuction among the most common plastic surgeries performed on men in the U.S.: 1,2

    Rank of rhinoplasty and penile enlargement among those most commonly performed on men in the U.K.: 2, 1

10/04Estimated price a British cable company will charge for a kit to track “ evidence of the paranormal” via the Internet: £150

12/04Estimated number of Britons sent government warnings last fall of their increased chance of having mad cow disease: 6,000

2/04Price a British company charges for its Purring Kitty software, which converts a mobile phone into a “discreet massager”: $2.65

3/04Ratio of the number of privately contracted military workers in Iraq to the number of British troops there: 5:4

5/04Months into the war that Britain confirmed that all its troops were outfitted with desert clothing: 9

6/04Chance that a British infantry recruit’s reading and writing skills are no better than the average 11-year-old’s: 1 in 2

6/04Chances that God exists, according to a British physicist working as a risk analyst in Ohio: 2 in 3

7/04Years after symptoms of his deranging genetic disorder appeared that King George III held the throne in England: 56

7/04Average inches by which a British man’s height fell short of an American man’s in the eighteenth century: 3.1

    Average inches by which an American man’s height falls short of a British man’s today: 0.4

8/04Rank of Labour among British political parties that won the most votes in local elections in June: 3

8/04Percentage of Britons who cannot name the city that provides the setting for the musical Chicago: 65

1/05Percentage by which British university graduates are less likely than non-graduates to phone their mothers regularly: 20

    Percentage by which they are less likely to make regular visits: 50

1/05Portion of British trash that ends up in landfills: 4/5

    Portion of German trash that does: 2/5

10/05Percentage of patients hearing voices who hear a male voice, according to a British study: 71

    Percentage who hear an “upper-class” or “BBC” voice: 30

12/05Portion of British food aid for Katrina evacuees that still sits unused in an Arkansas warehouse: 7/10

12/05Percentage of British adults who are members of any of their country’s three major political parties: 1.2

    Percentage who are members of the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds: 1.9

    Ratio of the number from Britain to the number from Italy, the third-largest contributor: 3:1

2/05Number of Britons who have signed a declaration stating they will disobey any ban on fox hunting: 50,000

    Number of foxes eaten by a British performance artist to protest the protests of the proposed ban: 2

3/05Percentage of Britons who say their neighborhood would disapprove if more Iraqi immigrants moved in: 64

    Percentage who say this about black immigrants from Africa: 43

4/05Percentage of Social Security contributions that go toward administrative costs: 0.6

    Average percentage of contributions to Britain’s privatized pension system that do: 30

4/05Number of the 701 arrests under Britain’s Terrorism Act since 2001 that have led to conviction: 17

4/05Estimated number of visitors each week to the grave of Harry Potter, a Briton buried in Israel in 1939: 45

6/05Years after Bob Marley’s death that the BBC, in April, requested an interview with him: 24

7/05Average percentage of the U.K. population that Britons believe to be immigrants: 21

7/05Total value of bets taken by a U.K. bookmaker this spring on the identity of the new pope: £50,000

9/05Percentage of Asian-Americans whose primary source of news is not in English: 25

    Percentage of Arab Americans for whom this is true: 40

1/06Chance that a Briton has bought a book “solely to look intelligent”: 1 in 3

11/06Amount that U.S. embassy staff in London owe in unpaid traffic charges: $1,600,000

12/06Number of Americans and Britons who now work in the IT industry in India: 30,000

12/06Percentage of Britons who say they would give up sex to live to 100: 40

12/06Portion of Britain’s fertility clinics that have an insufficient supply of sperm: 7/10

3/06Number of weapons that have been turned into tools for African farmers by a British nonprofit since 2001: 2,200

3/06Number of books published in Britain since 2004 that have “shit,” “shite,” or “ crap ” in their titles: 23

5/06Chance that a British youth reports having been bullied via text message: 1 in 7

7/06Number of “peace walls” that divided Protestant and Catholic communities in Belfast at the time of the 1994 ceasefire: 30

7/06Percentage by which Britain’s The Independent outsold its daily average on May 16, the day U2’s Bono was guest editor: 30

    Last date on which the newspaper sold as many copies: 9/12/01

2/07Amount that Britons paid to “Nigerian-style” email and letter scams last year: $661,500,000

4/07Number of the world’s top ten English-language Scrabble players who are not native English speakers: 3

5/07Rank of money and God, respectively, among “the very best thing[s] in the world” to British children under 10: 1, 10

5/07Rank of Britain among twenty-one rich countries the U.N. ranked this year for “child well-being”: 21

5/07Amount the British military spent in 2002 researching whether psychics could find terrorist hideouts: $35,000

    Chance that a psychic it tested could, blindfolded, identify some portion of the contents of a sealed envelope: 1 in 3

    Chance that a psychic fell asleep during the test: 1 in 6

6/07Percentage of British Muslims aged 16 to 24 who advocate death for Muslims who convert to another faith: 36

    Percentage who say they “admire organizations like al-Qaeda that are prepared to fight the West”: 13

8/07Percentage of British children aged seven to eleven who say they “worry about global warming: 34

    Percentage who believe their own parents are to blame for the problem: 15

8/07Number of prisons in England that provide personal trainers for unfit inmates: 25

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