Readings — From the January 2019 issue

Swamp Things

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From reported behaviors of Republican legislators who were elected or reelected in November.

Posted erotic drawings of bigfoot
Voted to make it legal to kill hibernating wolves and bears
Bragged about shooting a bear while the animal was asleep
Suggested using wolves to reduce the homeless population
Suggested that if women can have abortions then men should be able to rape women
Said Jewish people could have prevented the Holocaust if they owned guns
Claimed assault weapons needn’t be banned because they are too big to be used to
    commit crimes
Called the ban on executive bonuses in the AIG bailout a “tar baby”
Advocated for canceling Martin Luther King Jr. Day and weekends
Opposed retirement
Claimed that AIDS is spread by way of toilet seats
Claimed to have received forgiveness from God for sleeping with a patient
Brought a snowball to the House floor as proof that climate change isn’t real
Joked from the floor of a state legislature about killing puppies with a baseball bat
Shot a neighbor’s dog with a handgun

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