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Senator Edward M. Kennedy (D., Mass.) died of brain cancer at age 77 and was buried near his brothers John and Robert at Arlington National Cemetery. He served 46 years in the Senate, where he was an advocate for voting rights for minorities (and 18-year-olds), the rights of the disabled, the abolition of the draft, and–less successfully–health care reform. “The place won’t be the same without him,” said Senator John McCain (R., Ariz.). Rush Limbaugh said that Kennedy was “the lion of the Senate” and that “we were his prey.” “He left a woman to drown,” tweeted Fox News analyst Tammy Bruce, “and now he’s left us to drown.” “Hopefully,” said Eric Sanger, a director at the Sean Hannity Show, “this event will mark the end of this repugnant family.” Shortly before he died, Kennedy (who received his first communion from Pope Pius XII) sent a letter to Pope Benedict XVI. “I know that I have been an imperfect human being,” he wrote, “but with the help of my faith, I have tried to right my path.” eNews Park ForestMedia MattersThe New York TimesCBS NewsPoliticoAPYahoo! NewsThe White House announced that the economy would shrink by 2.8 percent this year, and President Obama reappointed Ben Bernanke as chairman of the Federal Reserve.The Washington PostOMB WatchFT.comA new, less-redacted version of a 2004 CIA report on interrogation methods was released. “I’m very proud of what we did,” said Dick Cheney of the torture program, which involved guns, shackles, mock executions, and drills. Attorney General Eric Holder Jr., against the supposed wishes of the White House, appointed a prosecutor to investigate the CIA’s practices,The Washington Postand Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad called for those who protested his sham victory, including opposition leaders, to be vigorously prosecuted.Al Jazeera
Forty people died in a bombing in Afghanistan.Al JazeeraJets from Israel bombed an alleged tunnel in Gaza,BBC Newsand Scientologists were digging tunnels in southern California, which was still burning.The Valley ChronicleThe GuardianRomanians booed Madonna after she asked them to stop discriminating against Gypsies.CBS NewsWall Street JournalBBC NewsDominick Dunne died, as did 36-year-old DJ AM, whose passing was much tweeted. “Don’t know how i am gonna play 2night but i am for AM,” wrote Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker. “My brother is gone. i love u and miss u.”New York TimesEdward Rondthaler, a proponent of spelling reform, died at age 104. “Foenetic speling,” he once wrote, “wil maek reeding and rieting neerly automatic for evrybody.”New York TimesA man who was sniffing gas from an aerosol can was tasered by Ohio police, at which he burst into flames,Mail Onlineand Oklahoma methamphetamine addicts discovered a new method–”shake-and-bake”–for making meth quickly in a soda bottle. “If there is any oxygen at all in the bottle, it has a propensity to make a giant fireball,” said a Missouri police sergeant. “You’re not dealing with rocket scientists here anyway.”St. Louis TodayIndia lost contact with the Chandrayaan-1 moon probe, and South Korea’s first satellite failed to reach orbit.Express IndiaCNN
British apocalypse scientists found that mixotrophs–organisms that derive energy from dead organic matter–can live for six months in total darkness.New ScientistThousands of people signed a petition asking the British government to issue an apology for how it treated gay mathematician Alan Turing, BBCand a Welsh man named Roland Mery, facing a two-year wait before he could have gender-reassignment surgery, chopped off his own penis. “Ring 999, Julie,” he yelled to his wife, “I’ve done it!”Wales OnlineSean Lynde, a graphic designer and a former roadie for the band Guster, was arrested in New York City for poisoning and beating to death his girlfriend’s four kittens, six months after someone posted a notice on Craigslist that read “KEEP CATS AWAY FROM THIS MAN.”The New York Daily NewsA deaf, blind, 16-year-old dog named Louie died after being left alone for hours in the hot car of Robin Starr, CEO of the Richmond, Virginia, SPCA.AP via Yahoo! NewsParts of a baby were found in the sewage works of the English town of Hull,Mail Onlineand wealthy Ugandans were sacrificing children. “They say if you don’t take blood, the wealth will go,” explained an investigator.The ObserverThe U.S. Forest Service warned campers to look out for marijuana growers, who can be identified by “tortilla packaging, beer cans, Spam, tuna, Tecate beer cans,” and the sound of Spanish music. “When I go camping,” said an immigrant-rights activist, “I’ll be sure to play nothing but Bruce Springsteen.”APTwin monkeys in Oregon were born to two mothers by means of a new technique that will one day allow for a child to have three parents.Live ScienceIBM took a picture of a solitary molecule,BBC Newsand scientists at Caltech found that the amygdala regulates our sense of personal space.Science Daily
More from Paul Ford:
Flor Arely Sánchez had been in bed with a fever and pains throughout her body for three days when a July thunderstorm broke over the mountainside. She got nervous when bolts of light flashed in the sky. Lightning strikes the San Julián region of western El Salvador several times a year, and her neighbors fear storms more than they fear the march of diseases — first dengue, then chikungunya, now Zika. Flor worried about a lot of things, since she was pregnant.
Late in the afternoon, when the pains had somewhat eased, Flor thought she might go to a dammed-up bit of the river near her house to bathe. She is thirty-five and has lived in the same place all her life, where wrinkled hills are planted with corn, beans, and fruit trees. She took a towel and soap and walked out into the rain. Halfway to the river, the pains returned and overcame her. The next thing Flor remembers, she was in a room she didn’t recognize, unable to move. As she soon discovered, she was in a hospital, her ankle cuffed to the bed, and she was being investigated for abortion.
Average amount of time a child spends in Santa Claus’s lap at Macy’s (in seconds):
Beer does not cause beer bellies.
Following the arrest of at least 10 clowns in Kentucky and Alabama, Tennesseans were warned that clowns could be “predators” and Pennsylvanians were advised not to interact with what one police chief described as “knuckleheads with clown-like clothes on.”
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“Matt was happy enough to sustain himself on the detritus of a world he saw as careening toward self-destruction, and equally happy to scam a government he despised. 'I’m glad everyone’s so wasteful,' he told me. 'It supports my lifestyle.'”