Readings — From the January 2008 issue

My Dinner With Antrophagus

From a March 6, 2001, transcript of an online chat between Bernd-Jürgen Brandes (cator99) and Armin Meiwes (antrophagus), included in Interview with a Cannibal: The Secret Life of the Cannibal from Rotenburg, by Günter Stampf, published in Germany last fall. Brandes responded to an online advertisement Meiwes posted stating that he was seeking a “well-built man, 18–30, who would like to be eaten by me.” Meiwes videotaped himself slaughtering Brandes a few days later. He confessed to the act and was convicted of manslaughter in 2004. The ruling was overturned in 2006 on the grounds that the sentence of eight and a half years was too lenient. Meiwes was retried, convicted of murder, and resentenced to life imprisonment. Translated from the German by Jina Moore.

Cator99: Hallllooooo????

Antrophagus: Hi, Cator, what do you do professionally, that you are up so late at night?

Cator99: I can’t sleep well anymore because of our meeting

Antrophagus: That’s a sensible reason. Yesterday I was incredibly tired, it was a stressful day

Cator99: I’m in telecommunications

Antrophagus: Oh, that sounds interesting

Cator99: I believe you

Antrophagus: I’m looking forward to our meeting, it will definitely be really cool

Cator99: I want it to be! I hope it’ll be really cool. Are you setting an alarm clock?????

Antrophagus: It’s only a few days until March 9

Cator99: Still, I would have rather met you yesterday and felt your teeth

Antrophagus: One can’t have everything. There’s still some time before you really feel my teeth

Cator99: I hardly know what to expect. Have you slaughtered a man before?

Antrophagus: Unfortunately, only in my dreams, but in my thoughts I do it every night

Cator99: So I’m the first? You have eaten human flesh before, or you haven’t?

Antrophagus: No, you don’t exactly find it in the supermarket, unfortunately

Cator99: How do you know if it will taste good to you, or that the blood won’t make you sick?

Antrophagus: I’m readying myself with my dreams. Once I was so excited I grabbed a needle and drew my own blood so I could drink it

Cator99: And your blood, it tasted good to you?

Antrophagus: It was quite tasty. Once I was drilling some holes and the drill slipped right into my hand, that was a real treat. Blood is the juice of life. It contains everything a person needs for nutrition

Cator99: Then I hope you won’t wilt, that you can really see it through without a problem

Antrophagus: To bite into your penis will certainly not be easy—living flesh is somewhat more resistant than fried—but one thing is certain: our dream will be fulfilled

Cator99: But there’s not so much in it as there is in muscle

Antrophagus: Yeah, but the penis is principally a spongy material filled with blood

Cator99: For both our sakes, I hope that’s true. I hope you have also already thought about what’s to be done with the rest. Fulfilling the dream shouldn’t become a nightmare for you. No one will know where I’ve disappeared to

Antrophagus: After you’re dead, I’ll take you out and expertly carve you up. Except for a pair of knees and some fleshy trash (skin, cartilage, tendons), there won’t be much of you left

Cator99: There will be a good bit, like the knees, I hope you have a good hiding place for them

Antrophagus: I’ll dry out the knees and grind them up soon after

Cator99: Okay, they’re good as fertilizer, I heard that once. I see you’ve thought about it. Good! Sounds like I’m the first

Antrophagus: And you won’t be the last, hopefully. I’ve already considered catching a young person from the street, but I would rather kill only those who want to be killed

Cator99: That also doesn’t sound bad. But yeah, seeing as it’s not so totally legal, this is in my eyes better than yanking somebody directly off the street

Antrophagus: Exactly, I’d do it, if it were legal

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  • Mimi

    Hey,
    my name is Michele and I’m from Germany. I’m a student who has to write an essay about some kind of interessting theme. I’d really like to know if someone could publish the whole conversation between Meiwes and Brandes, so this would ease my research.
    Thx for giving me the possibility to read this

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