Boko Haram steps up its attacks in Nigeria, South Korea mourns a ferry disaster, and Gabriel García Márquez dies at 87 Read More
The infiltration of eastern Ukraine, the pain of Heartbleed, and the wrath of God Gazarov Read More
Afghanistan votes, the U.S. Supreme Court rules in favor of wealthy political donors, and China standardizes its pets Read More
Ennui sets into the search for Malaysia Airlines Flight 370, Guinea combats Ebola, and the distinctive arson of Cameo Crispi Read More
Malaysia declares Flight 370 lost, the Westboro Baptist Church loses its patriarch, and Hawaiian police officers fight for their right to have on-duty sex with prostitutes Read More
Crimeans vote to join the Russian Federation, the mystery of Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 deepens, and Joseph Jambon tackles the fornicating slipper snail Read More
A plane vanishes over Southeast Asia, Russia and Ukraine stake out their positions on Crimea, and Canada expands its Moose Sex Project Read More
Crisis in Crimea, corruption in Turkey, and the inadequate diversity of Google Doodles Read More
Upheaval in Ukraine, yobbery in the United Kingdom, and a historic douche in the United States Read More
A U.N. report compares North Korean prison camps to Nazi concentration camps, Barack Obama plays through drought in California, and Canada’s Inuit are warned away from raw Beluga meat Read More
The Winter Olympic Games open in Sochi, Al Qaeda splits with ISIS, and a cat named Quiver survives an arrow shot Read More
The president wants to raise the minimum wage, Pete Seeger and Philip Seymour Hoffman pass away, and a criminal is sentenced to Gladwell Read More
Photographic evidence of war crimes in Syria, ominous Ukrainian texting, and a South Korean tower of jawbones Read More
Obama announces surveillance reforms, the Taliban bombs a Kabul restaurant, and Smartie snorting prompts nose-maggot panic Read More
A Pakistani ninth-grader sacrifices himself to save his classmates, Chris Christie saves himself, and Cormac McCarthy’s ex-wife chooses an unconventional holster Read More
Factional warfare in the Middle East, a politician under indictment for genocide seeks peace in South Sudan, and an embarrassment of coldness in Minnesota Read More
War and peacekeeping in South Sudan and the Central African Republic, a brief truce in the Syrian civil war, and bells hell in Manhattan Read More
More NSA surveillance targets are revealed, violence in South Sudan, and claims of U.S. virgin births Read More
The Ukrainian protests rage on, Nelson Mandela is buried, and China sends a Jade Rabbit into the Bay of Rainbows Read More
Walmart celebrates Black Friday with protests and police reports, Amazon experiments with drone delivery, and Republicans salute the end of racism Read More
The countries and companies responsible for climate change, nuclear options in Congress and Iran, and the extinction of Darwin's frog Read More
Casualty counts and corruption in the Philippines, protest and repression in Russia, and the usual news from Toronto Read More
One of the most powerful storms on record strikes the Philippines, the mayor of Toronto has a problem, and cheeseburgers as post-coital couture Read More
Syria finishes destroying its chemical-weapons facilities, the United States kills the leader of the Pakistani Taliban, and Axe body spray fells eight New York City students Read More
The NSA’s phone tap on Angela Merkel is exposed, European authorities investigate false reports of Roma kidnappings, and Kim Jong-un receives an honorary degree from HELP U Read More
The U.S. government shutdown ends, Saudi Arabia turns down a U.N. Security Council seat, and an Alaskan town debates a successor for its cat-mayor Read More
“Little boys” negotiate the U.S. government shutdown and debt ceiling, Bashar al-Assad wants his Nobel Peace Prize, and the Vatican tells the world about Lesus Read More
The U.S. government shuts down, African migrants capsize in the Mediterranean, and miscellaneous global crushings Read More