Weekly Review

Coup de Chance, Woody Allen’s 50th film, made its U.S. premiere; its title translates to “stroke of luck,” and a total of 13 theaters elected to show the flick. Read More

“It mostly felt like a brief speed bump,” said a Pennsylvania man who was receiving a vasectomy when a 4.8-magnitude earthquake struck New Jersey and the New York City metropolitan area. Read More

Dairy cows have tested positive for bird flu for the first time. Read More

Lawyers for Donald Trump indicated that the former president was too cash poor to post his $454 million bond, and that none of the 30 would-be lenders he approached for loans would grant him the sum. Read More

In Haiti, Prime Minister Ariel Henry announced he would step down once a transitional council was in place, and an ex-police officer and current gangster known as Barbecue threatened politicians who were planning to take part in the council. Read More

A 62-year-old German man who was administered 217 COVID-19 vaccines reported no side effects and no cases of the virus; researchers found that the 217th shot had further boosted the man’s immunity. Read More

President Biden said the U.S. would begin airdropping food and supplies to Gazans, but twice confused Gaza with Ukraine during his announcement. Read More

An unidentified flying object observed traversing the skies of Salt Lake City, Utah, turned out to be a balloon; a joint military command issued a fighter jet to intercept it. Read More

Nearly one-fifth of Americans believe in a conspiracy theory involving the strategic government use of Taylor Swift to increase Biden’s reelection chances. Read More

Nikki Haley lost Nevada’s Republican primary to the “None of These Candidates” ballot option. Read More

In Pennsylvania, a 32-year-old self-published author of dystopian science fiction who recently sued the United States over his student-loan debt used a machete to behead his father, who had been a federal employee for 20 years, and then posted a video of himself holding the head in a clear plastic grocery bag as he called for the execution of all government workers. Read More

The president of the Philippines used a taxpayer-funded helicopter to fly to a Coldplay concert. Read More

Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders introduced a resolution stipulating investigation into human rights abuses before additional U.S. aid is disbursed to Israel; the measure was rejected. Read More

Tunnels were discovered beneath a Hasidic synagogue in Brooklyn; a rabbi called the group of men who had dug the illegal structures and later clashed with police “rogue, and, frankly, unwell youths.” Read More

An Alaska Airlines flight made an emergency landing after a door-size section of the plane blew off 10 minutes after takeoff. Read More

An Amazon warehouse in New York asked its employees if they were facing financial hardship during the holiday season and encouraged them to write to the company’s mascot, an orange blob named Peccy, to fulfill their “holiday wishes.” Read More

The House passed an $886 billion defense bill, which set a new record for military spending and included measures that the House Armed Services Committee said would “end wokeness in the military.” Read More

In Rainier, Washington, a candidate for city council did not cast a ballot in his own election and then lost by one vote. Read More

A government official in Paraguay resigned after he signed a “memorandum of understanding” with a fictional country. Read More

A far-right politician who was once banned from visiting the United Kingdom owing to the extremity of his his anti-Islam views won the largest number of parliamentary seats in the Dutch election. Read More

Donald Trump’s campaign said that those who compare his rhetoric to that of fascist dictators would be “crushed.” Read More

Pro-Israeli and pro-Palestinian demonstrators brawled outside Los Angeles’s Museum of Tolerance. Read More

Several people who attended ApeFest in Hong Kong were diagnosed with welder’s eye. Read More

Scientists studied the ways in which sperm defy Newton’s laws of motion. Read More

A New Orleans tattoo shop owner was cleared of charges in a ransom plot to turn the Jefferson Davis memorial chair into a toilet. Read More

It was reported that a Kansas teacher and stand-up comedian had been fired for TikToks in which he described “crop dusting” students with “big milky lactose intolerant farts” and teaching them that Abraham Lincoln was the inventor of the car. Read More

Several Amish people were reported shunned after the U.S. government’s Wireless Emergency Alert test revealed that they had phones. Read More

A Chucky doll was handcuffed and arrested in Colombia after a man used it to intimidate robbery victims. Read More

An Australian tested local regulations by naming her son Methamphetamine Rules. “He’s a very chill child,” the mother said. “So not anything like a meth user.” Read More

Colorado representative Lauren Boebert was ejected from a performance of the musical Beetlejuice after vaping, using her phone to record the show, and stroking her companion’s crotch. Read More