Weekly Review

The House passed an $886 billion defense bill, which set a new record for military spending and included measures that the House Armed Services Committee said would “end wokeness in the military.” Read More

In Rainier, Washington, a candidate for city council did not cast a ballot in his own election and then lost by one vote. Read More

A government official in Paraguay resigned after he signed a “memorandum of understanding” with a fictional country. Read More

A far-right politician who was once banned from visiting the United Kingdom owing to the extremity of his his anti-Islam views won the largest number of parliamentary seats in the Dutch election. Read More

Donald Trump’s campaign said that those who compare his rhetoric to that of fascist dictators would be “crushed.” Read More

Pro-Israeli and pro-Palestinian demonstrators brawled outside Los Angeles’s Museum of Tolerance. Read More

Several people who attended ApeFest in Hong Kong were diagnosed with welder’s eye. Read More

Scientists studied the ways in which sperm defy Newton’s laws of motion. Read More

A New Orleans tattoo shop owner was cleared of charges in a ransom plot to turn the Jefferson Davis memorial chair into a toilet. Read More

It was reported that a Kansas teacher and stand-up comedian had been fired for TikToks in which he described “crop dusting” students with “big milky lactose intolerant farts” and teaching them that Abraham Lincoln was the inventor of the car. Read More

Several Amish people were reported shunned after the U.S. government’s Wireless Emergency Alert test revealed that they had phones. Read More

A Chucky doll was handcuffed and arrested in Colombia after a man used it to intimidate robbery victims. Read More

An Australian tested local regulations by naming her son Methamphetamine Rules. “He’s a very chill child,” the mother said. “So not anything like a meth user.” Read More

Colorado representative Lauren Boebert was ejected from a performance of the musical Beetlejuice after vaping, using her phone to record the show, and stroking her companion’s crotch. Read More

A New Jersey business owner was arrested for using a drone to dye people’s swimming pools green. Read More

A San Francisco official was forced to resign after he offered a tour during which participants could “get close and personal to the doom and squalor” of the city. Read More

Scientists announced that neurotic people probably shouldn’t colonize Mars. Read More

An AI-written Microsoft Travel article recommended an Ottawa food bank as a “cannot miss” tourist spot. Read More

A man crashed a stolen garbage truck into a hot tub store on the Dolly Parton Parkway in Tennessee. Read More

“We have to jump on this trend,” an El Salvador funeral home owner said of his new pink, Barbie-themed coffins. Read More

President Joe Biden’s dog was reported to have bitten seven people in a four-month span. Read More

Authorities in Berlin searching for a lioness found a brood of “startled piglets.” Read More

Officials attempted to apprehend a 5-year-old sea otter who has been accosting local surfers and stealing their boards. Read More

A poll was reported to have found that over 40 percent of Americans do not know what July Fourth commemorates. Read More

“We think that it’s just, air goes through your nostrils and you move. No, there’s a science to breathing.” Read More

It was reported that a Harvard researcher who studied dishonesty had been accused of fabricating data. Read More

A Belgian psychologist found that most adults suffer from “end-of-history illusion.” Read More

An employee of an organ donation nonprofit who had filed a workplace complaint was reported to have found three severed heads on his desk. Read More

A purification ceremony took place at St. Peter’s Basilica after a naked man stood at the main altar to protest the war in Ukraine. Read More

It was reported that octopuses may have nightmares. Read More