Weekly Review

Several Amish people were reported shunned after the U.S. government’s Wireless Emergency Alert test revealed that they had phones. Read More

A Chucky doll was handcuffed and arrested in Colombia after a man used it to intimidate robbery victims. Read More

An Australian tested local regulations by naming her son Methamphetamine Rules. “He’s a very chill child,” the mother said. “So not anything like a meth user.” Read More

Colorado representative Lauren Boebert was ejected from a performance of the musical Beetlejuice after vaping, using her phone to record the show, and stroking her companion’s crotch. Read More

A New Jersey business owner was arrested for using a drone to dye people’s swimming pools green. Read More

A San Francisco official was forced to resign after he offered a tour during which participants could “get close and personal to the doom and squalor” of the city. Read More

Scientists announced that neurotic people probably shouldn’t colonize Mars. Read More

An AI-written Microsoft Travel article recommended an Ottawa food bank as a “cannot miss” tourist spot. Read More

A man crashed a stolen garbage truck into a hot tub store on the Dolly Parton Parkway in Tennessee. Read More

“We have to jump on this trend,” an El Salvador funeral home owner said of his new pink, Barbie-themed coffins. Read More

President Joe Biden’s dog was reported to have bitten seven people in a four-month span. Read More

Authorities in Berlin searching for a lioness found a brood of “startled piglets.” Read More

Officials attempted to apprehend a 5-year-old sea otter who has been accosting local surfers and stealing their boards. Read More

A poll was reported to have found that over 40 percent of Americans do not know what July Fourth commemorates. Read More

“We think that it’s just, air goes through your nostrils and you move. No, there’s a science to breathing.” Read More

It was reported that a Harvard researcher who studied dishonesty had been accused of fabricating data. Read More

A Belgian psychologist found that most adults suffer from “end-of-history illusion.” Read More

An employee of an organ donation nonprofit who had filed a workplace complaint was reported to have found three severed heads on his desk. Read More

A purification ceremony took place at St. Peter’s Basilica after a naked man stood at the main altar to protest the war in Ukraine. Read More

It was reported that octopuses may have nightmares. Read More

Physicists investigated the ideal storage conditions for gummy candy. Read More

An Australian woman who became stranded in the woods was able to survive for five days on wine and candy. Read More

After workers at an eating disorder helpline unionized, they were replaced by a chatbot. Read More

Documents labeled “Official sensitive” were found in a pub toilet on what one pubgoer described as “quite a lively night” in Barrow-in-Furness, England. Read More

It was reported that after a DoorDash driver was in a car accident and rushed to the hospital, the company asked his wife if she would complete his delivery. Read More

ChatGPT passed an undergraduate quantum physics exam and immediately emailed the dean to ask for a better grade. Read More

Scientists announced that human memory of shapes is unreliable after one and a half seconds. Read More

Amsterdam launched a new campaign aimed at urging young British men looking for a “messy night” to “stay away” from the capital in an attempt to cut down on nuisance tourism. Read More

In Israel, an opposition lawmaker compared members of the governing coalition to Minions from the Despicable Me films. Read More

The volume of uncollected trash in Paris reached 10,000 tons. Read More